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devilman

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haunted princessMissLonelyפמיניסטיתפמניסטית עם חוש הומורcosmicBFFניקי
אבירם רובינגרits just me .צפון-קוריאה בעברית
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Abuse?
28/09/2019 03:17
devilman
אמא
...I've found too that narcissistic parents demand that you agree with them or else they'll reject you, because being challenged to them means they are not loved.

Therefore, adult children of narcissists experience love that’s conditional only (based on certain conditions and specific actions that must be demonstrated). From that experience of needing to behave in a certain way to be loved and accepted, they never receive the validation, empathy, and unconditional love and nurture that we humans all so desperately crave.



...I’ve seen in my therapy work and coaching that adult children of narcissists often feel this:

  • Never good enough or valuable enough
  • Deeply afraid to speak up confidently or challenge others
  • Very attuned (to an almost uncanny degree) to what everyone around them is feeling, because they have a hyper-sensitivity to what others are experiencing (they had to have this in order to survive being raised by a narcissist). This can lead to their inability to protect themselves from others' emotions.
  • Chronically unsure of themselves, and overly-worried about what others think of them
  • Deeply insecure, because they never experienced unconditional love. Any love or care that was given was done so under certain challenging conditions that made them feel inauthentic and fake.
  • That the relationships they’ve form (either at work or in personal life) are deeply challenging and unsatisfying (and even toxic and frightening). When they step back and look at these relationships honestly, they see narcissism all around them and they have no idea what to do.
  • Finally, they feel used and beaten up by their work, by their bosses and their colleagues, and can’t understand why their careers are so challenged and difficult.

But I don't know if my mom's love isn't unconditional. It's unimaginable and beyond insolent to assume this, to even begin to assume this. Was my mom's love given under challenging conditions? How can I even think this? How?
2 תגובות
intense
10/09/2019 01:09
devilman
intensity
0 תגובות
Breath me
23/07/2019 02:11
devilman
0 תגובות
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